According to Zoe: How to Be a Total Asshat at the Cinema
Friday, April 1, 2016 at 8:01AM
Nicole in 2016 A to Z Challenge, A to Z Challenge, April Fool's Day, Blogfests, Blogging from A to Z, comedy

Hi my name is Zoe, one of the fashionistas in Nicole’s collection of traveling companions that have hijacked this blog to entertain you for the next 26 days. We call ourselves The Popcorn Snobs.

Just like any good heist movie, our theme -- The Taking of April A-Z – involves a lot of twists and turns; there’s no telling what (or who) is around the corner.

Being the altruistic person I am, I’m going to start this adventure off right by teaching you a single (and simple) skill needed to becoming the world’s greatest asshat at the cinema.

Turn the Brightness level for Your Cell Phone Screen all the Way up to 100%

Boom. Instant Asshat!

Making your cell phone screen brighter is one of the easiest skills to develop because it doesn’t require a lot of effort on your part aside from tapping a few buttons in the settings menu of your phone. Plus, it takes up a merely seconds of your time, so you can spend the remaining duration of the movie doing important things – like texting, taking selfies like I do, and scrolling through other people's selfies on your Facebook feed.

We all know asshats make the world a better place. There are many at the multiplex and you can be one too! All it takes is caring enough to apply this one aforementioned skill during your trips to the movies and you will make lots of new friends.

Some moviegoers will be so eager to sit near you that they will fight other people over the best spot in the house that falls within your vicinity. Moviegoers who aren’t seated near you but witness your acts of asshatery will also sing your praises to the management and staff at the theater.

Hugs and Kisses,

Zoe

p.s.

Stay tuned for tomorrow’s post from Nate, about his trip to the theater. Oh, and Happy April Fool’s Day!

 

Zoe is a popcorn snob that believes movie theaters are one of the best places to take selfies, especially after the opening credits roll. She likes romantic dramas, comedies, wine, date nights and Oscar-worthy costumes.

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